How to get into my backpack

5 May

I get a lot of people asking me if they can tag along on our trip.  Well, at least three people have.  Now I’m a generous sort, and willing to share my good fortune, so I’ve come up with some criteria.  If you can prove that you meet all of these, and behave nicely, I might consider letting you stowaway*.

  1. Vote for me in The MADs.  This is the most important rule.  I have been shortlisted in the Best for Family Fun category.  If you vote for me and I win, you will be stowing away with an award winning blogger.  And who wouldn’t want to do that?  It’s very easy, just click on the link, then scroll down past the other four shortlisted blogs (it’s OK, they’re not very good) and click on ‘vote’ next to my blog.  See?  Simple!
  2. Carry your own luggage.  If you want to bring hair straightening thingamybobs, that’s up to you, but don’t expect me to carry them.  I will be carrying quite enough heavy electrical gizmos thank you.
  3. Be able to sniff out a decent coffee at 50 paces.  When I say ‘decent coffee’ I don’t mean that sweet brown milk that Starbucks sell by the overpriced bucketload.  I mean proper coffee, with a smell that can wake you from a deep sleep and a kick that enables you to churn out award winning blogs posts.
  4. Eat what you’re given.  I don’t like fussy eaters and I can’t be pandering to all manner of intolerances.  If it’s frog curry for lunch, that’s what you’ll have.  If my five year old son will eat it, so will you.
  5. Ask your friends and relatives to vote for me in the MADs.  See above.

Do you meet all of these criteria?  Great!  Please apply to join me on a Thai beach by leaving a comment.  Thank you.

*only human beings aged 18 and over who can physically fit in a 45l backpack eligible.

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21 Responses to “How to get into my backpack”

  1. Laura 05/05/2010 at 2:43 pm #

    *dances*
    Waheyyy!

    • itsasmallworldafterallfamily 06/05/2010 at 10:28 am #

      does that mean you’re in?

  2. Paula 05/05/2010 at 3:19 pm #

    No one ever said out and out bribery wasn’t alllowed- I think you’ve trumped my tangfastics though. I can go along with most of your demands but I’m not eating Frog Curry ….if that’s a dealbreaker you’d better let me know before I press the magic button 😉

    • itsasmallworldafterallfamily 06/05/2010 at 10:12 am #

      Well, as long as you eat the rice without a fuss I’ll let you off on that one. Although, I am being very kind. I hope no one else expects this treatment.

  3. New Mummy 05/05/2010 at 5:53 pm #

    Brilliant!!!

    • itsasmallworldafterallfamily 06/05/2010 at 10:29 am #

      I’m glad we’re in different categories 🙂

  4. Becky 05/05/2010 at 6:34 pm #

    Funny! I can definately smell out coffee…life long veggies so would wimp out on froggy curry and voting all done and must remin STATE secret xx well done you tho’ x

    • itsasmallworldafterallfamily 06/05/2010 at 10:10 am #

      thank you, and well done to you too!

  5. Gigi (MumsRock) 05/05/2010 at 9:32 pm #

    Okay. Now assuming that I am one of the three geniuses who suggested we open this baby right up (the other two being your mum and your cleaner maybe?) ….here’s my criteria for allowing you to bring me along:

    Only cook frog curry. It’s all I will eat.

    Let me sniff out the coffee, frothy bobbins will not be considered. Flat Whites promised at every turn.

    I may vote for you unless the blackmail attempt from @peabee72 holds up (and it’s not looking good at present). Nobody told me that you couldn’t do that with a Swan.

    I don’t carry my own luggage. Never have, never will. I wear kid gloves (No, not made from children – the other kind. Albeit mock). They stain easily.
    And there you have it. See you at bus stop.

    • Paula 05/05/2010 at 9:48 pm #

      Firstly, it’s a fact of life that kids stain easily – until they find a way to scotch guard them at birth that’s always going to be the case.

      Secondly the Swan thing – don’t think of it as blackmail, more as a moral and ethical signposting event. Much more civilised.

      Thirdly, frog balti is off the menu…. shut it down

    • itsasmallworldafterallfamily 06/05/2010 at 10:10 am #

      I will have you know that it was at least three people NOT including my mother. The cheek of it!

  6. Gigi (MumsRock) 05/05/2010 at 10:03 pm #

    LMAO! Deal breaker *siren alert*
    Firstly: Children are messy, and suggesting that they be scotch-guarded is only going to lead to one thing. Your blog going live on Mail Online.
    Thirdly: No-one puts Balti in the corner.
    And…..c) My mum always says, what happens on the Serpentine. Stays on the Serpentine.
    Shut it down yerself 🙂

    • itsasmallworldafterallfamily 06/05/2010 at 10:14 am #

      As long as it’s not MY blog going live on Mail Online I don’t care.

  7. Brighton Mum-Teenage Angst 05/05/2010 at 10:24 pm #

    Hahahah! *snorts coffee over keyboard* ‘no-one puts balti in the corner’

    • itsasmallworldafterallfamily 06/05/2010 at 10:30 am #

      I hope it was proper coffee.

  8. Jane 05/05/2010 at 11:14 pm #

    Love it all except the frog curry! I have pond and nurture it to keep the frogs coming so the dying breed doesnt breed, so I couldnt eat them! would try other things though

    • itsasmallworldafterallfamily 06/05/2010 at 10:14 am #

      It’s very tasty. Really!

  9. eggscreamandhoney 09/05/2010 at 9:24 pm #

    I’m glad we aren’t in the same category too! I could never go back packing – you would not believe how much I need to take with me when I go anywhere.

  10. Ben Wakeling 09/05/2010 at 9:48 pm #

    Congratulations on being a MADs finalist! I’ve somehow managed to blag my way into Blogger of the Year and Funniest MAD Blog, but competition is so fierce!

    I’m currently hosting a competition on my blog, where you can win one of eight great baby prizes by submitting your funniest or most embarrassing parenting story – if you have one please stop by and let me know!

    Ben

  11. Muddling Along Mummy 10/05/2010 at 9:05 am #

    Well since you asked so nicely AND I can stow away in your backpack …!

    • itsasmallworldafterallfamily 10/05/2010 at 10:45 am #

      Hooray, my plan is working!

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